I suspect we all know people who just have to be in a relationship. If a relationship ends they are immediately alarmed, desperate for the next person to fill the vacancy in their life. Is it okay or do you think there is something wrong with being so eager to fall in love?
Certain times of the year have the potential to be tested specifically for single people; Christmas, Valentine’s Day, birthdays, long weekends, events where couples are invited together can all increase the feeling of being alone and without a significant other.
- Some people don’t feel complete until they have a special person in their life, someone to care, to care for, to think about. They may also experience a physical imperfection when they are unlucky, a deep emptiness inside where their need defines who they are. Their relationship with their significant other gives meaning to their lives.
– But when a relationship is over, it is often good to have some time to ‘set the dust off, there is a period of adjustment, reflection, even grieving, followed by recovery and healing.
Whatever the reason for the breakup, there may be some benefit in taking the time to reflect on what happened, what went wrong, lessons learned, and, more importantly, what is and is not needed from future relationships. It can be good to take some time to learn to cope alone, even if it feels awkward or awkward. It’s important to commit to making time for yourself, to learn from past experiences, and to reacquaint yourself with who you are.
- After a breakup, we can become so aware of what we don’t want from the next relationship that we react by focusing on the desirability of traits and characteristics that are the exact opposite of our first and on other considerations become blind. , consequently noticing something else, good or bad, that falls outside that criterion.
- Thus, an ex who is highly organized, fit and sporty or a devoted fashion follower can lead us to react in search of a new partner who is more comfortable and relaxed than what we have turned away from Unlike her, only eventually become irritated by their apparent lack of care, realizing that there’s a good compromise somewhere in between.
– When we are so eager to fall in love it is tempting to see what we want to see where we only look at the shiny packaging that is being presented. It can be tempting to brush off occasional uncomfortable feelings and fights, justifying or excuse their off-days, irritability, or lack of motivation because we are so eager to make this new relationship work.
- It’s easy to forget that we’re seeing the best version of someone at the start of a new relationship, kind, friendly, eager to please a person who may also be eager to fall in love. They are comfortable, happy to like the same things, good for our kids, our elderly relatives, don’t be inconvenienced if we change our plans.
Everyone is on their best behavior in the early days of a new relationship, this is the honeymoon phase of the relationship. It’s fine if we’re able to enjoy it, but also appreciate that this is when we meet the best version of the person we’re dating. Finally, at some point in the future, it is normal that things will go wrong, create inconveniences and disagreements and have to be dealt with.
- Enjoy the good times. But also keep a healthy attitude. Enjoy the excitement and excitement of getting to know someone new; The sexual chemistry, the flutter when you get a text or are due to see them. But also be realistic and know that all relationships need work, patience, and patience to be successful, as well as a good sense of humor at times.
As you go, start over and establish good habits. Be clear about taking some time out for yourself, about maintaining existing friendships and interests, even if you choose to include them occasionally. Establish good channels of communication and discuss any ‘touchy topics’, issues, or disagreements that may arise. Share your feelings and be prepared to compromise on occasion. Then being in love can continue to be a wonderful part of your life.